My reaction to Hobby Lobby is a four letter word

I’ve been thinking and saying many four letter words when I heard the Hobby Lobby verdict from the Supreme Court this morning.



Son of a Bitch

Okay that last one wasn’t four letters, but I did say it.

In case you have been off the grid somewhere and just logged back into 2014, the Supreme Court ruled in favor of Hobby Lobby being able to exempt certain birth control coverage for their employees.  Specifically it’s A-OK for Hobby Lobby not to cover IUDs and Plan B.  The Supreme Court found that “closely held companies”  are not required to cover certain contraceptives if it violates their religious freedom.

This just in….  the “War on Christianity” in America is over.  Victory was declared today.

Moving on.

The four letter word I’m talking about to combat this horrible decision is not one of the words above  although it does make me feel better when I yell it.  Here try it.  Just yell one of those words.

See it does make you feel better.  It doesn’t change a damn thing, but it does make you feel better.

Back to the one thing that can make a difference.  It’s not going gluten-free or trying the latest juice fast.  It’s so simple – VOTE! 

Get your lazy ass off the couch and vote.  No excuses.  Don’t tell me there wasn’t enough time or you didn’t know who was running.  You have to vote.  The people who are voted into office appoint Supreme Court Justices and once they are appointed they are in there FOREVER!  Just look at Scalia for God’s sake.  The dude isn’t going anywhere and he has been in there since Reagan.  That’s before the internet kiddos.  That’s back when they were faxing their rulings.

Voting  matters.  Every election matters.  Even if they aren’t appointing Supreme Court Justices there is a program called Title X Family Planning that funds low-cost contraception.  Every year Republicans try to defund it.  That program is important now more than ever.  If employers are going to attempt to get out of covering contraception, we need to be sure the right people are in office who will continue funding important programs like Title X.

After you get done swearing about today’s decision – take the next important step and vote. Make sure everyone in your family votes.  Make sure your neighbors vote.

Oh and buy your craft supplies elsewhere.  Trust me – I stopped shopping at Hobby Lobby years ago and I’ve not been at a loss to find stickers and puffy paint.  Trust me your scrap-book of little Suzie will still look amazing.

I may have lost faith in our Supreme Court, but I always have faith in the American Consumer. We’ve buried bigger brands than Hobby Lobby.

Remember, swearing makes you feel better, but voting makes a real difference.




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This just in..MO votes to expand a current law.

This just in…another day, another more restrictive abortion law coming straight out of the heartland.

Oh hell, what’s new about that?

Not much.

This time it’s from the right side – the MO side.  I guess it depends which way I’m traveling down State Line.  Today, MO is on my right.  Right is also the political way the state is leaning with this abortion legislation they want to expand.  

However, right is not what this legislation is.

So here is my summary of the law.

Doctor has a woman who wants an abortion – contraception that is not abortion like sterilization and the morning after pill.  FYI – I’ve said it before and I’m saying it now, the morning after pill is NOT an abortion.  This is a common misconception.  Anyway, doc decides he is morally and religiously opposed.  Doc said, no way Jose am I telling you anything about abortion or Plan B.  You are on your own sister – this includes rape victims, victims of incest, etc. etc. The ONLY exceptions are women whose lives are in danger. This means if Betty has an ectopic pregnancy and her life is in danger, she has to be sick enough to show life ending distress, then doc can refer her to a hospital/doctor for a life-saving abortion.

Until then – sorry charlie.  If you want an abortion, I suggest you look up “A” in the yellow pages.  Gen Y – google yellow pages.

Now, a doctor can’t suddenly decide one day to have a moral objection.  Doctor has to have a track record of believing in the man upstairs.  However, I wonder what happens if doctor is “saved” one day?  I heard it happens.  Google – Stephen Baldwin for more info on saving.  Probably some readers of this blog are hoping it happens to me.   I guess time will tell.

There are so many issues with this, but I will work on two biggies.

Let’s start with #1 – the religious objection.  The religious objection is with the 10 commandments – thou shall not murder (is it shall or shalt? I always get them confused).  So you can say you are morally opposed because of commandment #6.  I understand that, but what about commandment #9?  If a woman goes to a doctor and says “Doctor I don’t want to continue this pregnancy is there anything I can do?  Is there anyone I can go to?”  Aren’t you lying if you say “no”?  Huge moral debate here.  Not to mention the big debate over the rights of the physician vs. the rights of the woman.  Holy ethical mess!  If someone wants to buy me a beer (or a few) we can debate this one.  I don’t have an answer.

#2.  I’m getting pretty tired of legislation every single day involving abortion from both sides of the state line.  How about this ladies…

Let’s go back to 411 BC – to the Greek play Lysistrata.  Women wanted to end the Peloponnesian War so guess what they did?  They withheld sex! (gasp from my male readers.) I’m sure all of this legislation would end and we would stop having this debate every single freaking day if women just would withhold the one thing causing all of this debate in the first place.  

The power of the…

OK, this is a “G” rated show.  Or at least PG 13.

Easy for me to say…I’m divorced and not currently dating.

I highly doubt we can get all Lysistrata over this whole thing, but it is a thought.  

I think most people would agree…a very, very lonely thought.


My weekly list: hybrids, eyebrow waxing, Pro-Life and Julia Roberts

So I’m sitting in a coffee shop writing my blog. This is a first. I feel so cool just by association.  I’m really just killing time waiting to meet some friends for dinner.  Of the six people in here on a Friday night, I could have birthed about 4 of them.  This is just fueling my fire and now Adele just started to play.

Perfect time to get a few things off my chest.  When I was thinking about what to write, there were too many things swimming through my brain to limit it to just one subject so I thought I would compile a Friday list of things.  Strap’s going to be a wild and random ride:

1.  My liberalmobile lied to me.  A few months back I gave up my gas munching SUV for an environmentally friendly hybrid.  My sky-blue baby even has a little earth on the dashboard that lights up with an ivy halo when I reach peak environmentally friendliness.  You can only drive one of these if you are a card-carrying member of the Democratic party.  Now I find out that Hyundai lied to me about gas mileage.  It was an “oversight” said Hyundai.  Sure – if I forget to pay my car payment this month, I’ll blame it on an “oversight”.  Now, Republicans tell me again how government oversight is a horrible thing for businesses?  Turns out I will be getting a refund for false advertising.  Damn those government regulations.  Those bad, bad government regulations that keep businesses honest by making them actually tell consumers the truth.

2.  This little study that came out earlier this month that studied if women were given FREE birth control – that means access to any birth control, including IUDs and implants what would happen.  Turns out the abortion rate GOES DOWN.  Did you read that – the ABORTION RATE GOES DOWN.  My blood pressure continues to escalate when I try to figure out how people can be pro-life and anti-obamacare.  I absolutely, positively don’t get this one.  Check out this incredibly cool video below.  I hope people watch this before Tuesday and vote these radical, pro-life extremists OUT of office.  They just don’t make any sense!

3.  This is a random one, but one that the ladies out there will understand.  I have been getting my eyebrows waxed since I was 14 years old.  Yes, 14 years old.  These days, eyebrow waxing for preteens is something we only see on Toddlers and Tiaras.  We are outraged when we see it now, but remember, this was the 80s when seat belts were just becoming mandatory and cold medicine for kids was given in mass quantities, sometimes even just to put Jr. to sleep.  Anyway, my mom told me at the time that the more years I had it done the less it would hurt.  That’s right – the more years I had it done, the less it would hurt.  It has been 26 years later and it still hurts like hell.  She lied.  I”m still working through this.  It never gets any easier.  As much as I love my mom, I’ll admit I’m still kinda pissed.

4.  This election is almost over.  If I’m getting tired of it and I’m a political addict, you know it’s been bad.  I’m already looking for things to fill my time after Tuesday.  I’ve decided to go on a spiritual journey.  That means I’m getting ready to join a synagogue.  I’m thinking my spiritual journey will be like Julia Roberts in Eat, Pray, Love.  I’ve never seen the movie, but I fantasize that my journey will take me to far away places where I will meditate with Russel Brand, eat gourmet meals with Gwyneth Paltrow and pray with people like Madonna.  The realistic journey is I will get my tush down to the local synagogue and pray.  This should be interesting.  More to come with this one.  It definitely can’t hurt and if anything may help me to be a little more pleasant and possibly a little less eccentric.  God, I hope you are listening to this.  Get ready.

Have a great weekend.  Remember to vote.  Please vote for Obama, but if you must vote for Romney – we can still be friends.  Just vote.  One thing is for sure, Tuesday night I will either be cheering or sobbing, but the world will keep on turning.  Wednesday will still come far too early and we will get up and get on with our lives putting one foot in front of the other.  America will survive and the same issues will be debated for generations to come.

Goodbye Rick…you will be missed

Dear Rick,

I knew this time would come.   I knew we would have to say goodbye.  So many memmories I will take with me when this campaign is over.  I remember when you were just starting out.  No one believed in you at first.  You were up on the stage, looking so eager.  Someone please pay attention to me,  I thought your eyes shouted out on that big debate stage.  You were such an under dog.  Come to think of it, you look a bit like Under Dog:

That’s all over now as you gracefully exit the race.  Now all I have left is this image of Under Dog in my head to comfort me.  You were so close too.  So close to wrecking havic on this nation’s social programs, sex lives and porno.  To think, this nation could have been one second away from resembling a 1950’s sitcom (and not in a good way) and it could have all been thanks to you.  It’s now all over. 

I keep dreaming of what a Santorum presidency would have been like.  I know in my heart you would have done something radical, because that is just the type of man you are and picked a non politician for your running mate.  That is what this country needs, and knowing that, you would have announced a Santorum/Duggar ticket.  Instead of Bruce Springsteen for a campaign song, you would have picked the Duggar’s playing violins up there on the campaign stage and America would have fallen in love.  Foreget Camp David for your get aways as President, Branson would be the President’s new playground.  No inviting the public to the annual White House Easter Egg Hunt, your kids plus the Duggars would have covered it.  This country could have been your Christian, legislative playground. 

Now what are we left with?  I guess Romney who we all know is not wanted by the GOP.  Just a moderate in sheeps clothing.  Not a true conservative like yourself.  No more Santorum who was willing to set this nation back 50 years with views on Women’s Health.  Oh well Rick, I still have my memories to sustain me.  Thank you for dragging this campaign out as long as you did.  It was your fierce competitive spirit and outrageous ideas about contraception that helped fuel that GOP War on Women that I think is going to help defeat Mitt Romney this election.  For this, we have you to thank. 

Go rest now after such a valiant effort.  I am taking this moment to thank my God that you did not succeed.  See I believe in God as much as you do.  It’s my belief that God does things for a reason.  In this case the message is loud and clear.

Yours in comedy spirit,


My email to Sen. Merrick about SB 62 in Kansas

Dear Sen. Merrick,

I urge  you as a voter in your district not to vote for SB 62.  I understand by your voting record you are pro-life.  I respect the existence of pro-life and pro-choice Americans.  I do not believe the world needs an all or nothing stance.  However, this bill is too vague.  It will cause Kansas to open itself up to costly lawsuits in order to define this bill.  The state of Kansas cannot afford to waste any more money in the judicial system trying to define vague legislation.  

I know that as a fiscally responsible representative, you want to see Kansas thrive economically.  In a time when our state needs to focus on fiscally responsible legislation passing a bill like this is financially irresponsible. I would say this about any bill that is this vague in definition. This state is desperate to elect fiscally responsible politicians both Democrat and Republican.  Voting in legislation that will cost this state millions in legal fees does not make sense in a time when school funding is being cut, we desperately need job growth and our social programs are suffering from budget cuts. 

I am fine if you are pro-life just like you should recognize that  voters in your district are pro-choice.  Please continue to do your best to convince women not to seek abortion by preaching this message in your church and among your friends.  Please keep this vague and costly legislation out of our government.  Kansas simply can’t afford it.

I am confident you will do the right thing.  This voter is paying attention.


Gov. Brownback – my proposal to create jobs & restrict women’s rights at the same time: a microchip

Governor Brownback, or Sam.. can I call you Sam?  I think I’m going to call you Sam since you are working so hard to control my vagina, I think that means we are becoming pretty intimate.  So I see you are all about job creation for Kansas per your press release today.  Thank God, oh excuse me, “goodness” that is something we can agree on!  I don’t think there is a person, republican or democrat, who disagrees with job creation.  It’s a great thing and especially a great thing for Kansas.  Technology jobs are a great thing for Kansas.  I was thinking about that today and also thinking about all of the restrictive legislation our great state of KS has proposed to limit my rights as a woman.  What would be a great way to create jobs, especially those in the tech industry and continue your fight to turn back the clock on women’s health to something equal to that of the Victorian era?

Ah ha!  I’ve got it!  Microchips.  Microchips are the thing that can solve all of our problems.  I know that they can be used to implant in the family pet. If Fido gets out, it can send a signal back to command center “Find Fido” and family pet can instantly be located on GPS.    My proposal is we build a plant right here in the great state of KS and develop these microchips to implant in a woman’s vagina.  Now, it sounds radical, but so did mandatory vaginal ultrasounds at one point.

Stay with me here, the microchips can monitor every part of a woman’s cycle and report all of the findings to her state government.  This would include all sexual partners, any form of birth control and any attempts to abort any pregnancies.  Once Christian conservatives have their way and outlaw all contraception, it can monitor a woman’s cycle and report back to the woman the “safe” times in a woman’s cycle to have sex to avoid pregnancy by sending out a series of signals.  I think we need to work on the signal part.  I’m not sure if the signals should be beeps or vibrations.  The beeps could be too loud and the vibrations…well, we wouldn’t want the women to get sexually aroused.  I mean, we all know that sex is purely for procreation only.  There should be no arousal or pleasure from sex by conservative republican standards.  Vibrations are definitely out now that I think about it.  That settles it, beeps are in. That could be slightly awkward if the signals went off while at work.  Oh well, government legislation has made sex lives of women so public I guess we should all get used to knowing the intimate details of everyone.  The microchip could monitor the number of sexual partners a woman has so it could determine the “slut” factor of a woman and report that finding back to a woman’s employer, her political party, her church, the government.

Republicans are all for cutting the size of government except when it comes to overseeing women’s bodies so let’s create a new government department (oh, I know hypocrisy of it all – insert flirty laugh).  We will call it the Department of Vagina.  This department will be in charge of monitoring all of this data.  No need for gynecologists anymore with this microchip.  We can let the physicians know that if you aren’t delivering babies there is no need to be examining lady parts anymore.  The government has this handled thank you very much!  I think this is going to be great.  We develop and manufacture this microchip here in KS.  Think of all of the conservative states that will be lining up to order this, TX, OK, VA…the list is endless.

Let me know what you think Sam.  It is definitely a win-win for the state of KS.  We will look like we are pushing the boundaries of technology, creating jobs and playing God in the process.  Isn’t that really what you are after anyway?  I also want to recommend a state motto change – Kansas: where your vagina is everyone’s business.

Rush, next time use protection

Dear Rush,

Since we are so busy handing out apologies today, I thought I would offer you my sincere apology.  See I guess I have also been wrong and I was not even aware of it until you pointed it out on your show today.  I tuned in to your show and it is not something I do usually, but since you called the Georgetown student a slut last week, I decided to tune in today.

Well, it was a great opportunity to hear you explain yourself further based on the standard written statement you released over the weekend when no one was really paying much attention.  So I listened and that is when I realized that it was really me who owed you an apology.  I had no idea that you were really the victim in this whole affair.

While you were explaining yourself, you made it very clear that you were so seduced by the liberal side of the debate on contraception and that is what made you fall from your usual high communication standards and caused you to call Ms. Fluke a “slut”. You pointed out it is usually only liberals and Democrats who participate in such name calling and your standards are so much higher than our standards.  It was only because of this momentary lapse of judgement that you allowed yourself to be brought down to our level and play the same types of games we Democrats play by calling out this woman as a “prostitute” as you say.

So, Mr. Limbaugh, with that I do offer my sincere apology.  I had no idea you were so easily brought down to my level of politics and national dialog.  Now mind you, the words, “slut” and “prostitute” were your words alone.  You picked those words to describe this young woman.  The level that I choose to reside at when discussing a category of individuals usually goes like this; underserved, disadvantaged, wealthy, elitist, man, woman, wife, husband, Christian, Jew, African American, Caucasian.  These are the ones I generally use.  I can see how these words confuse you and you believe are similar to the words you picked.  I can also see how your level of political analysis and dialog is so much higher and my level is so much lower.  For this I am truly sorry.  I had no idea the power of my liberalness and the pull of the left wing in this nation toward inclusion could be so seductive and could cause you to so easily fall off your pedestal.   Ah, the power of the ….what is it?  It starts with a “p”?  Politics, yes politics is the word I’m looking for.

I hope now that your apology is out there to the American people, you can dust yourself off and put yourself back up on that higher level.  The level where exclusion is much more important than inclusion.  The level where life is grand provided you have the money to be able to maintain membership to this higher level club.  Continue to fight hard against us, Mr. Limbaugh with our moral arguments that everyone should be equal and decent healthcare should be available to all not just to those who can afford it.  I know that kind of talk is just dirty and so obscene that it makes you say things like women who use birth control are sluts.  I know, I know that kind of talk just brings out the worst in you and I understand why.  Get comfortable in that elevated club of conservatism.  I know!  Maybe you should build a fence around it?  A golden fence and it should be patrolled by border agents.  That way you can never be seduced off of it by our liberal pull.

A word to the wise, if you should happen to be seduced down to our level again, maybe you should consider using protection?  It may prevent you in the future from having words like “slut” and “prostitute” slip out of your mouth again.  When you use protection, things won’t happen that you don’t plan to have happen in the first place.  Then you don’t end up having to pay for the consequences for the rest of your life.  The consequences can be extremely costly as I think you are finding out with your advertisers now using the rhythm method and all pulling out.


Aimee Patton

I’m sorry, no really really sorry, kinda sorry, I think.

Well, Rush apologized. Only after a twitter war erupted that was nuclear in strength did he apologize. Only after sponsors began jumping ship from public pressure did he finally retreat. Only after deafening criticism from politicians and media did the giant finally fall. Then when he finally offered the olive branch it was on a Saturday, when no one really pays any attention, except news nerds like me, and it went something like this, “This is Rush, I am sorry I called the student a slut. My point still stands however, but I guess I’m not as funny as I thought. Love, Rush.” Of course these are my words, not his, but I will save you the agony of reading the forced statement.

I have always been told the sincerity of an apology can be found in the content of the apology. If the apology is only an apology then it is sincere. If the apology is followed up by the further stressing of the original point, then it really isn’t an apology. The old, “I’m sorry, but blah blah blah” doesn’t really mean the person is truly sorry. I’ll admit, I am a debater by heart, and I struggle with this. I have insulted people when arguing a point I am passionate about. For clarification, I have never insulted anyone like Rush did and would never think to, but I know I have stuck my foot in my mouth a time or two. In the past, whenever I have apologized I have been very mindful to only apologize and never to continue arguing my point. That is the entire reason for apologizing. If I offend someone I never do it on purpose. To show that it was not on purpose, I only apologize for the offense and that is all. To continuing arguing my point shows that maybe there was intent to insult. Rush does not do this and continues to argue his point in the apology. This is why, I believe, his apology is not sincere. But I am just one in a jury of millions.

So will this be enough to calm the masses? This fury train left the station long ago. Now, there is an “occupy Rush” planned for Monday. People furious with Rush plan to call in to his show to basically cause a virtual sit in and clog his phone lines. First, there was the apology demanded and now people want him fired. Will he be “fired”? I use quotes, because if he ends up fired from one station, he will find a home at another. The fact is that Rush makes money. Millions of dollars are made from Rush and that means his job is secure. As awful and disgusting as I think the man’s rhetoric is, he will have his show somewhere. I admit that I tuned in last week to hear his show the day after “slutgate”. What was he talking about? Some study from Britain that sited that a certain number of women would pick bigger boobs over higher IQs. With all of the interesting political things to discuss, this is what he picked…boobs. Not Iran, the situation in Syria or even the number of domestic issues here at home, but boobs.

So now we wait and see. Will this be enough? I don’t know. I think the fury that has been unleashed is partly towards Rush and the other part is generally towards the Republicans for the way they have handled this whole contraception debate in the first place. However, I do have one point to make with my side. I am irritated at my side for this overwhelming need to defend ourselves and justify why we use contraceptives in the first place. I have read the Facebook posts and tweets and almost all of them center around the medical reasons for contraception. So many women are telling their stories from the medical side of things. I am guilty of that as well. I make no secret of the fact that I used continuous birth control pills for years to control extreme endomeitriosis and PCOS until an emergency hysterectomy at 33. However, what I think is missing are the voices of women who are proud to say that they use contraception to have monogamous, responsible sex and prevent pregnancy. I think more women should be shouting that loud and proud in this debate because the people they are having this great monogamous and responsible sex with is men or they wouldn’t need the contraception in the first place. To admit this fact does not make women “sluts” as Rush says. To admit this makes us sexually liberated and that is something our mothers and grandmothers fought for in the 60s.

I don’t understand how a stripper pole aerobics class can find its way to the suburbs of most American cities, but women can’t stand up in this country and admit that they want affordable contraception in this country so they can have active sex lives and not have the added stress of unplanned pregnancies. It was not that long ago that America was religiously watching Sex and the City to see how four fabulous New York women lived their lives and no one called them “sluts”, well maybe Samantha. I think the problem with people like Rush and his comments is the assumption that women who use contraception are sleeping around with many men. That is old school thinking Gentlemen and it isn’t anyone’s damn business. I just don’t think it matters if contraception is for medical reasons or family planning reasons. I don’t think a person should have to justify either way to make sure it is available. I guess I am here to say, to those women who aren’t suffering from unbearable girlie gut problems, but still want contraception, you go girl! I mean it is 2012, not 1912 (snap).

With that awesomeness, I say good night.

From one slut to another

First, a quick Mazel Tov to Snooki on her pregnancy.  Can we all just have a moment of silence in hopes that there is no reality show involving this pregnancy, no book involving pregnancy or mommy advice from Snooki.  May she just find herself a nice little house in the burbs of Jersey and raise her little Snookette quietly. Amen.

Rush…Rush Limbaugh.  One can only  hope that his most recent rant was from some drug filled relapse from his prescription drug abusing days, because this one is a biggie.  In case you missed it Rush went on a rant about the Georgetown student who testified in the contraception hearings and offered this:

“What does it say about the college coed Susan Fluke [sic], who goes before a congressional committee and essentially says that she must be paid to have sex? What does that make her? It makes her a slut, right? It makes her a prostitute. She wants to be paid to have sex.

“She’s having so much sex she can’t afford the contraception. She wants you and me and the taxpayers to pay her to have sex. What does that make us? We’re the pimps.

“The johns, that’s right. We would be the johns — no! We’re not the johns. Well — yeah, that’s right. Pimp’s not the right word.”

I can’t believe Rush went there.  Will he apologize?  Does it matter?

The GOP must be handing out the Tums by the buckets.  Didn’t women already fight this fight back in the 60’s?

It is only because science has yet to develop a birth control method for men more advanced than the condom or less radical than sterilization that women are shouldering the burden of contraception.  If we take away the argument that birth control pills, IUDs, and Depo Provera are used to help so many gynecological problems that women suffer from and just talk about them from a fertility stand point, women should be applauded for shouldering the financial burden of helping to control our population and allowing our partners to enjoy a healthy sexual relationship without the added consequence of pregnancy.

I worked in Title X for two years.  I met clinicians who work in public health departments all over the country who see these “sluts” coming in for contraception.  These “sluts” were able to work, go to school and raise their families that they already had because of the great program of Title X.  I don’t view the women who need assistance with paying for contraception as prostitutes or sluts.  I view these women the same way I would view people who need assistance with diabetes medication or any other medication that keep them valuable members of our society.

So, Rush are you a “john”? Don’t flatter yourself.  What are you?  Someone who just added votes to the Democratic side and for that I thank you.  If this Georgetown student is a slut than so am I and I know a lot of other educated women who also would stand up and declare themselves sluts as well.

My GOP debate review: good ties, boring topics & the all white crowd

I watched the GOP debate on CNN last night.  I admit I did not watch the whole thing.  I ended up watching about an hour of it.  That was about enough for me to draw these conclusions.  One, the biggest winner of the night was men’s fashion.  Long gone were the traditional dark blue suits and navy blue or red ties.  This goes for everyone except Ron Paul.  I feel like it takes everyone on the Paul campaign to get Ron Paul’s pocket protector out of his shirt pocket, let alone into contemporary men’s clothing.  I applaud them for just getting the old guy dressed.

Tonight the candidates looked radiant in light blue ties and Newt scored with the daring purple tie.  We all know that purple represents royalty.  I guess he was going for American, political royalty with his choice of purple.  American, political royalty, like the Kennedy era, is a thing of the past.  His campaign has turned to that flicker of a candle wick right before it turns to smoke and the flame dies out.  Newt could not even be bothered to sit up straight in his chair.  He was leaning back with his jacket suit open and his big belly hanging out like the fat cat he is.  I felt like at any moment he was going to stick his hands down his pants Al Bundy style.  This is not the image of our next President.  He knows it and we know it, Campaign Newt is Campaign Over.  Somebody hit the gong a la Gong Show style.  Frame that Time Magazine cover and hang it in his man cave.  Newt had his 15 minutes this campaign.

The parts of the debate I did watch were so predictable.  There was the contraception hate off.  At one point Paul decided that all birth control pill were equal to abortion pills.  Dude, the 1850’s called and they want their OBGYN back.  I’m not sure when you practiced medicine, but it is starting to become embarrassing.  Statements like that are just dumb.  Women don’t die from broken hearts and we don’t bleed people as a cure anymore.  Young people may love your idea of freedom, but your points about modern medicine suck.

Santorum and Romney just tried to one up each other about how much they hate contraception, Title X and Planned Parenthood.  We get it guys, no need to continue to beat that dead horse.  It becomes a waste of time.  CNN, you could have saved that time and just said, please refer back to the other 19 debates if you require more information on the candidate’s stance on this issue.  Then they tried to out children each other.  Even more proof that natural family planning isn’t so great at controlling families.  There is the rhythm method part, but then there is the super gross part about vaginal mucus that nobody talks about.  I can’t wait until we have a nation that has to monitor their vaginal mucus for birth control.  That will be awesome dinner conversation.

I think the best part was when CNN’s camera panned the audience.  Note to whoever stages the audience: find some minorities.  Seriously any minorities will do.  Even some white people with a tan would have been better than what I saw.  That was the whitest audience ever assembled.  At least with Herman Cain in the race there were some of his relatives in the audience of those debates adding to the mix.  Like I said in the beginning, maybe I missed the minorities and they were at the back of the crowd and did get to ask questions, but when I turned in I almost had to put on sunglasses to stop the white glare from the audience.  Hard to get the feel that the GOP represents all people when the audience and the candidates only look like they support white people.  Of course, this is just my opinion.

In conclusion, I will miss these spirited debates.  There is so much more to discuss, but once we figure out who the GOP nominee will be then we will get to the actual Presidential debates.  Those will be really fun.  I’m still on the edge of my seat waiting to figure out who the nominee will be.  I think it has come down to one of the two in the light blue ties.  Which one, I have no idea.

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