Good news people who suffer from hypothetical illnesses – KS HB2553 is just for you!

Another day another bill to attempt to defund, make illegal or just outright outlaw Obamacare. This time it comes from my favorite KS Representative Brett Hildebrand. Hildebrand sponsored HB2553 – the healthcare compact bill. Now what the heck is a health care compact? It basically takes the newly formed Federal program of Obamacare and puts healthcare back into the control of the states that are included in a healthcare compact. HB2553 even has a pledge that reads (I’m currently standing with my hand on my heart as I write this-cue the patriotic music.)
“The member states shall take joint and separate action to secure the consent of the United States Congress to this compact in order to return the authority to regulate healthcare to the member states consistent with the goals and principles articulated in this compact. The member states shall improve health care policy within their respective jurisdictions and according to the judgment and discretion of each member states.”
Amen – ok I added the amen part, but this is KS. I’ll assume they left just forgot the amen.

So let’s break this down – KS has voted to remove Obamacare and put the authority of healthcare oversight back to the states. States can opt-in to this health care compact.
Quick question – what if all 50 states opt in? Does it then become a federal program?
I know, stop over thinking this Aimee. The main goal is to get KS away from Obamacare. Here’s the dealio – the health care compact doesn’t exist.
Let that sink in for a sec….KS House voted to opt-out of Obamacare in favor of a healthcare compact that doesn’t even exist. Read here for more info on the bill.

http://www.kansascity.com/2014/03/24/4912715/house-passes-bill-to-separate.html
Since the healthcare compact is hypothetical, we can only assume that the new healthcare compact will only cover hypothetical illnesses.
So attention Kansas citizens! If you are suffering from the following you will be covered in the new Healthcare Kansas Compact:
• A case of the Mondays.
• Kimyeitis – the nauseous feeling you get when you see Kim and Kanye West do absolutely anything these days.
• Whiteaholicism – the illness that causes people to wear white after Labor Day and before Memorial Day.
• Parallel Parking Syndrome – the illness that makes it impossible for most people to parallel park with any accuracy.
• Loud Cell Phone Disease -this debilitating illness that makes it impossible for most to talk at a normal level on their cell phones in any public places.
• Candy Crushitis – the inability to stop playing candy crush until you have successfully crushed every jelly.
• MarchMadnessphobia – the fear that your college basketball bracket is at any minute going to turn to junk.
This is just the tip of the iceberg in what the Health Care Compact is going to cover.
What is very real about this bill is it asks that the states who are part of the health care compact receive full funding from the federal government.
(I can’t stop laughing). Let me get this straight – you want to opt out of a federal program in favor of a hypothetical program and you want FULL federal government funding to do so? There is some saying about a caking and eating it that comes to mind.
What isn’t funny is there is no provision in the bill exempting Medicare. Call your aging parents – KS just voted to make the very successful federal program of Medicare a state-run program.
(That sound you heard was my mother screaming, “Like hell they are going to mess with my Medicare.”)
Now that the Kansas House has established themselves as the expert in passing bills based on hypothetical things, I can only assume next up will be bills including:
• Building unicorn farms throughout Kansas;
• Creating the only national space alien landing pad;
• Establishing Kansas as the tooth fairy headquarters.
Way to go Kansas. This bill really corners the market on ridiculous!

 

 

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Cheesus Christ say it ain’t so…a Velveeta cheese shortage!

cheeseIf your can of Rotel in your cabinet is lonely, you better tell the spicy tomatoes to get used to it.  Kraft just acknowledged there is a Velveeta cheese shortage.

“Any issues with availability are much more noticeable given the seasonal demand,” from the Kraft statement.

The shortage couldn’t come at a worse time with the Super Bowl right around the corner.  This announcement has football fans reeling on what to dip their chips into.  It also has Americans thinking about a bigger problem – surviving a nuclear attack.

“Not having Rotel cheese dip for the Super Bowl is one thing, but we have always counted on Velveeta to help us survive a nuclear holocaust.  I mean the cheese doesn’t even have to be refrigerated.  Along with Twinkies, it’s America’s go to food for a man-made disaster,” said every American.

The Republicans were quick to blame the shortage on Obamacare.  “People are depressed with the new health care roll-out.  When people are depressed they eat.  We know that Americans have turned to Velveeta to help them drown their sorrows with the new health care roll-out. Nothing makes Americans feel better than cheese dip and tortilla chips,” said a Republican strategist.

Democrats were quick to counter focusing the blame on the Republicans.  “Unemployment benefits are running out.  Americans are turning to cheap staples just to help them survive.  Velveeta cheese is a fallback food that is cheap and delicious.  I mean have you had macaroni and cheese made with Velveeta?  It only makes sense that there would be a shortage.  We need to focus on the Republicans to fix this problem,” said a popular Democratic figure.

We can only expect Kraft to respond like any smart American company and drive up prices to profit on the shortage.  Forget better forecasting on demand, just inflate the prices and see just how much Americans are willing to pay for our artificial cheese.

This writer is prepared to pay a pretty penny to be sure that I have hot, gooey Rotel dip to go with my Super Bowl party.  Name the price Kraft…just name your price.

Rick Santorum’s statement on Mandela- he NAILS IT!

Nelson Mandela passed away and the world continues to mourn his death.  Activist, political prisoner and former President of South Africa, Mandela brought about change in a segregated country and finally helped a nation heal from a tragic time in their country’s past.

World leaders and politicians have been expressing their condolences in the media.  President Obama will travel to South Africa to pay his respects to the most beloved leader.

I believe Rick Santorum, Republican darling and previous Republican Presidential candidate, said it best when he said on the Bill O’Reily Show:

“Nelson Mandela stood up against a great injustice and was willing to pay a huge price for that. That’s the reason he’s mourned today, because of that struggle that he performed,” Santorum said. “But you’re right, I mean, what he was advocating for was not necessarily the right answer, but he was fighting against some great injustice, and I would make the argument that we have a great injustice going on right now in this country with an ever-increasing size of government that is taking over and controlling people’s lives, and Obamacare is front and center in that.”

Wait…apartheid and the fight to repeal Obamacare similar?  Let me think about it for a second….

Mr. Santorum, let  me be the first to say, “you NAILED IT.”

OMG…I mean the similarities to end apartheid and repeal Obamacare are so blindingly similar.  How did I not see it before?

The list on how these two things are similar is endless.  I immediately had a running list going.  Here are some of the highlights:

The intent is the same….

  • Apartheid means “the state of being apart”.
  • Republicans want to do anything possible to keep apart Americans from affordable healthcare.

It’s about prisoners…

  • Nelson Mandela spent 27 years in prison.
  • The Republicans held America prisoner with a 16 day shutdown in 2013.

It’s about race…

  • Apartheid was directed towards black Africans.
  • President Barak Obama is black.

It’s about voting…

  • Our nation’s politicians voted for and pass the Affordable Care Act making it law.
  • A huge segment of South African’s population couldn’t vote just because of the color of their skin.

It’s about hospitals…

  • Black Africans were forced to use separate hospitals under apartheid.
  • Obamacare gives access to hospitals and medical care for people who need it who may have been denied before because of lack of insurance coverage.

It’s about rich, white men..

  • Apartheid was supported by rich, white men.
  • The Republican party is mostly rich, white men.

A huge thank you Mr. Santorum for pointing out something that was so obvious I almost missed it.  One thing in all seriousness that I will say the two have in common is dedication…dedication by Nelson Mandela to end apartheid and dedication by the Republican Party to end Obamacare.

That is about all the two things have in common.  Nelson Mandela sacrificed much for the greater good of the African people.  He sacrificed his freedom for what he believed in.  The Republican Party can’t seem to see past their own interests for the greater good of the American people.  They can’t see that Obamacare is now law and stop bickering for the greater good of the country.

The two things couldn’t be any more different. 

And to think that some people think the Republican party has an image problem.  Just when I think the Republican Party is starting to get in touch with the American people, quotes like Mr. Santorum’s happen to remind us just how out of touch this party is.

I will say that as a Democrat…I hope that Mr. Santorum run for President again and that his party nominates him.  The defeat of this ignorance will be so sweet.

#Obamacare I’m quirky & website has quirks so it’s a match made in heaven

If you haven’t heard Obamacare is a DISASTER!  Everyone is running around screaming, “the sky is falling!”  As a result – business are cutting hours, premiums are rising and Paris Hilton has a new song with Lil’ Wayne.  Ok, maybe that last one isn’t a result of the Obamacare disaster, but it is still a disaster.Chicken-Little_Sky-is-Falling

How bad is it really?  I took it upon myself to find out.  Here’s my 411 so you can understand why Obamacare isn’t a disaster for me:

I work for a small company – under 10 employees.  We were recently told that we had the OPTION to look into Obamacare as an alternative to our employee healthcare.  Our employee healthcare IS NOT going away, but we were welcome to shop around.  Shop around?  This is a new concept in medical insurance.  I love to shop so I said yes!

Approximately 4 years ago I had my own business and I was under my husband’s health insurance.  Cue divorce and I lost my husbands benefits.  Because of pre-existing conditions that are none of your damn business, getting health insurance was next to impossible.  I had to give up my business and go to work for health insurance OR use the emergency room as my primary care walk-in clinic.  I chose to go back work to have medical benefits unlike millions of Americans.  This experience has me rallying for Obamacare to be a success, but in this post I am honest in my reporting on how things went when I signed up.

Yesterday I logged on and created my account – approximate time: 3 minutes.  (disclaimer – to be fair I type crazy fast 89 wpm)

Website didn’t implode.

I filled out all of my information.  I encountered one error message and I clicked on the x to make it go away.  It went away and never returned.  I continued to fill out all of my information.  When I entered my social, it brought up relevant information about me to conclude I was who I said I was.

Overall the total time for me to fill out my account info and submit my information:  approximately 15 minutes.

I am waiting for my result.

My theory is that since I’m quirky and the website has quirks – our quirks cancelled each other out and the website worked like a charm.  I was honestly prepared for the worst and found it to be a rather fast and boring experience – which is a good thing.  I could get back to laying candy crush in no time.

Now will I use the insurance once it’s presented to me?  I don’t know yet.  The point is that I have options.

To all of the Republicans claiming that Obamacare is a disaster to business remember a healthy workforce is a better workforce.  Companies weren’t “required” to offer health insurance before and MANY did.  You have to stop and ask yourself why?  I think it’s because : 1.  to keep employees healthy so they can work more and 2. to remain competitive in the hiring pool.

Those businesses who are claiming that they have to cut hours, because they can’t afford it – get more creative in cutting costs elsewhere and offer good employees medical benefits.  Thousands of American businesses have been doing that BEFORE Obamacare and will continue doing so after Obamacare.  Sometimes employees searching for employment will decide on an employer who offers the BEST benefits package.  If businesses want to compete in recruiting and retaining top talent, they will offer great benefits to do so.

Will premiums go up?  For some they will and for others, like me they will probably go down.  The sky hasn’t fallen on me.  In fact, my sky is bright blue and sunny!

Thanks Obamacare.

Signed,

Aimee (pre-existing conditions) Patton

 

Top 5 things I’m going to do now that this shut down is over

The votes are in.  The one Republican that I could still kinda dig- Rep. Kevin Yoder voted Nay.  I’m still trying to get over that one.  I will heal.  The shut down is over.  

Now what?

(crickets)

While I wait for my next outrage and with this political climate there is ALWAYS going to be another outrage, here are the top 5 things I’m going to do in the meantime:

(in no particular order)

1.  Watch panda cam and see if the panda ever breaks out into a song and tap dance routine. I have complete faith that the panda does more than eat, sleep and poop.

2.  Figure out what the hell is up with my bangs. This idea of bangs before botox isn’t working out great for me.  

3.  Learn how to snapchat, but before I figure out snapchat see #2. (FYI if you aren’t Gen Y- users can take photos, record videos, add text and drawings, and send them to a controlled list of recipients.)

4. Enjoy candy corn, because candy corn is ONLY good in the month of October.  After October it tastes like crap.  Think about it – do you ever eat candy corn in any month other than October? It’s best to eat the corn in 3 separate sections the white being the worst and the yellow the best.  

5.  Attempt to apply for Obamacare. I’m sure all those glitches are fixed by now.

If it walks like a duck..

Today’s post isn’t a letter to anyone.  It is just a post about my thoughts.  I think like 99.9% of all Americans, conservative and liberal, regarding the government shut down….I am o-v-e-r-i-t!

Here’s my list of thoughts in no particular order on this Monday:

1.  Even I am sick of talking about the shut down and that is serious.  When I can talk politics all day every day and I am sick of it you know there is a problem.  I’m opting to read gossip magazines to find out the latest about the Jenner split BEFORE I read the latest happenings on the Hill.

2.  Regarding the closing the WWII memorial – here’s the deal folks – stop scheduling the Memorial Flights until it reopens.  The monument is CLOSED whether you like it or not.  Also, tone the drama down a bit.  The veterans aren’t exactly “storming” the monument.  They are walking quickly towards it, but they aren’t exactly “storming” it. If some of the veterans miss seeing the memorial, well that’s sad, but think of all of the veterans that lived without a memorial up until it was built.  Memorials are amazing, but they are statues – they do not make the person or define the experience.  Let’s stop acting like this is a trip to the Holy Land.

3.  The rollout of the Obamacare WEBSITE has been a disaster.  I want to be clear – I’m not talking about the entire program just the website.  The firm who designed the website gets two thumbs down from me.  It’s 2013 and you KNEW that there would be MILLIONS of people hitting this website at one time.  Experiencing this many technical glitches is unacceptable.  I may be a loyal Democrat, but if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck…

A bad website doesn’t mean the entire program is a bust.  Everyone take a deep breath and let’s see what happens when the refresh button actually refreshes.

4.  Two big thumbs up to Obama for the gas prices.  Here in Kansas City gas prices are a $2.97/gallon for unleaded. Woohoo – that sure helps right now.

5.  As much as America HATES the thought of career politicians, the whole mess we are currently in makes me stop and think about the benefit of career politicians to keep us out of future messes.  Before we get all high and mighty voting all of the bums out of office think about what got us here in the first place.  There may be something said for career politicians knowing what it takes to negotiate and just how far they can push each other until we end up with monuments being shut down, WIC programs not receiving food and our nation’s food supply not being monitored.  

Hey these are just my thoughts…

Now back to reading about the Jenner split.  Wake me when we hit the debt ceiling.

#GOP turns entire government into an entitlement program

On this busy Sat. I think I’ll catch you up on what’s been going on with Congress. There has been one vote that every member actually agrees on.
Hello? Wake up…Sorry you fainted.

That’s right. I said one vote that they all agree on.

They voted to provide backpay to all government employees. Do I think they deserve it? Yes, however, there is one glaring fact the party who is against entitlement programs just turned the ENTIRE United States government into a massive entitlement program. Everyone gets paid for doing NOTHING.

Can taxpayers who are paying for this big extended vacay get a t-shirt out of this? How about one that says, “Government employees got to take an awesome vacation and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.”

Let’s see how this whole genius idea has played out for the GOP:

1. Disagree with Obamacare so shut down the government.
2. Obamacare opens anyway.
3. Complain that Democrats and Obama won’t negotiate. (GOP – see #2)
4. Vote to pay the workers you shut down in the first place.

As you continue to put the fun back in dysfunction in our US government, the debt ceiling is fast approaching. The questions remaining are:

1. How bad will DC stink since the trash isn’t being taken out at national parks?
2. Will soccer moms start bathing their kids in anti-bacterial hand wash since no one is monitoring the flu?
3. Will you boys manage to dismantle the entire world economy by having the US default on the debt ceiling?

And these are the days of our screwed up American lives.

My serious appeal to the Tea Party.

Dear Tea Party:

I didn’t think you would actually do it, but you did.

You broke the government.

Today, tourists from some dysfunctional, third-world country will visit Washington, DC and they will marvel in how close it now resembles their own.  “I thought we had problems with abuse of power and government coups, but it’s nothing compared to this mess,” said anonymous tourist from west African nation.

It’s so bad that 80-year-old WWII vets are “storming” the WWII monument today that has been “closed” due to the shutdown.  Makes me want to stand up and sing “God bless America.”

Now I know what has my panties in a wad about the government shut down – things like Head Start running out of money and the WIC program being defunded.  These are government programs that help the under privileged in our society – our impoverished children who may go hungry, because of this partisan bickering.

If you are a Tea Party member and you are reading this, I probably sound like Charlie Brown’s mom right now.  So I will stop my liberal speech about those “entitlement programs” that cause big government and do little things like feed kids.

In an effort to bridge the gap, I am making an effort to point out some of the programs that mean a lot to the Christian conservatives that will suffer because of this shut down.  Maybe by taking the time to point out these valuable programs, we can understand the other side and hopefully start-up negotiations as a way to jump-start the most powerful government in the world.

Here are the top 3 things that mean something to the Tea Party and have been shut down:

1.  Gun permits could be slowed down or even stopped!  In a time when conceal and carry permits are at their all time high, forget WIC programs being de-funded, your gun permits could stop being processed.  Holy AK-47 Batman!  This is serious!  How can you be a good guy with a gun to fight off the bad guys with guns if your government can’t process your gun permits?

2.  The Navy-Air Force Game may be postponed.  “Troy Garnhart, an associate athletics director for Air Force, told The (Annapolis) Capital newspaper there “is a possibility” the game would be affected. Garnhart told the paper that upper-class cadets at Air Force are considered military personnel, which means they could be subject to travel restrictions under the shutdown.”  We are talking about football – the great American sport, not some silly educational program here people.  Get back to the negotiating table.  There is pizza and beer to consume, television to watch and football to be played.

3.  The pandacam is down.  This is serious people.

Enough said.

 

It’s all the rage to rage against Obamacare

Dear people who live in the suburbs, people who frequent Facebook and people who currently have health insurance:

I’ve got a little secret.  Lean in real close…

Guess what?  This is probably going to come as a shock, but the Affordable Care Act doesn’t apply to you.

(Insert HUGE gasp!)

I know.  It’s shocking.  Based on all of the outrage that is coming from the Republicans and the media blitz that has taken place this last week, you would think that it does have everything to do with you, but it doesn’t.  I actually heard claims like..

“Obamacare is causing the downfall of our economy.”

“Our nation will crumble under the weight of Obamacare.”

“Big business will fail, because of Obamacare.”

You get the picture.  It seems all the rage right now to blame Obamacare for just about everything. In fact, I’ve taken to substituting the word “shit” for “Obamacare”.  A guy cut me off in traffic on my way home.  I hit the breaks, “Obamacare man! Watch where you are going!”  I got a papercut at work, “Obamacare! That hurt.”

I think since the most vocal opponents to the Affordable Care Act are those WITH health insurance, how about if we take it a step further and just blame all of our suburban rage on Obamacare.  For example:

  • If your cable goes out during a big football game – ‘damn Obamacare!’
  • The drive-thru get your meal wrong and forget the packets of ketchup – ‘freaking Obamacare!’
  • Susie’s soccer practice is at a different time and field than when and where you show up – ‘Ugh..Obamacare!’

If my memory serves, these same people were griping about how the uninsured were using our emergency rooms as their primary care clinics not so long ago to the tune of…oh what was it?

From the American College of Emergency Physicians:

Hospitals and physicians shoulder the financial burden for the uninsured by incurring billions of dollars in bad debt or “uncompensated care” each year. Fifty-five percent of emergency care goes uncompensated, according to the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services Health care costs for both the full-year and part-year uninsured will total $176 billion dollars this year – $86 billion of which will be incurred when they are uninsured. 

“See, it’s that damn Obamacare to blame!”  Wait, I guess that didn’t work like I wanted it to and in fact it may help solve this problem.  I am, however, out of Diet Coke – “I curse you Obamacare!”

#KS has a bad case of malaise – we might need ACA to clear that up

KS Lt Gov. Jeff Colyer believes Kansas has a case of economic malaise that has marched across Kansas and it is devastating small businesses here in the heartland of America.  What’s the cause of us not being able to leave our recliners and get to work?  Obama of course more specifically the Affordable Care Act.

Colyer actually had a pow-wow with a joint committee of Congress where he laid out his evidence that ACA was the root cause of our blues.  “Wherever I go, the biggest concern I hear is the uncertainty about what the law is going to do to small business,” Colyer told a joint committee on economic growth and health care. “The issues are profound and detrimental to our citizens.” http://cjonline.com/news/2013-09-18/colyer-offers-critique-us-health-insurance-reform

How detrimental?  Colyer points out that Kansas had our unemployment rate INCREASE in August  for the third month in a row to a whopping 5.9%.  His conclusion: Obama and his Obamacare MUST be the cause. 

It is because of our increasing unemployment that we MUST repeal the Affordable Care Act (for like the 150th time).

To prove his theory rock solid, I did a little more research.

The Department of Labor reviewed the unemployment statistics and noticed that our workforce grew in April and May and UNEXPECTEDLY contracted in June and July.

Tyler Tenbrink, a senior economist at the labor department, said analysis of the up-and-down nature of the labor force in Kansas had yet to be completed. The stall and decline in the past two months may turn around just as quickly, he said.

“We’re going to need some more data points to see what’s going on,” he said. “It could be an anomaly.” http://cjonline.com/news/business/2013-08-19/kansas-unemployment-rate-hits-2013-high-59-percent

Damn Obamacare for these anomalies.

According to the statistics, the government shed 18,900 jobs.  This could possibility be contributing to the unemployment rate.

I wonder why so many jobs have been eliminated?

Thinking…thinking…

Is it because of all of the extreme funding cuts that Brownback has caused leaving the state in a critical stage with certain vital public services and eliminated key positions in our government and government agencies?

No that can’t be it.

It MUST be caused from Obama and Obamacare!

Well done KS Lt Gov. Colyer.  I do believe you nailed it.

 

 

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