This just in. God sent me a message to deliver to Akin. God heard your prayers about staying in the race for Senate. In fact he, no I’m sorry, she said enough already with the praying. She got your message…all of your messages.
She wants me to tell you that she is proud of you for standing up and apologizing for saying that any form of rape is legitimate. She knows you messed up and didn’t mean that. Nobody in their right mind would say that rape of any sort would be legitimate.
God is still angry. See you left out a key part that you didn’t apologize for. You didn’t apologize for implying that women can just will a pregnancy from happening. In the controversial statement, you seemed to imply that if women didn’t want to get pregnant, we could just think it away and it wouldn’t happen. God said she spent countless hours designing our amazing female reproductive system and to imply that our system could be circumvented by a few strong thoughts is crazy.
Since you are looking to God so heavily to decide if you are staying in this race or not, I thought I should give you some direct feedback from upstairs. Just a little FYI, God also doesn’t agree with your position on the morning-after pill either. See the morning-after pill is not the abortion pill. She says she wouldn’t have given doctors the ability to come up with this technology if she didn’t want people in our society to be able to better regulate their fertility. She wanted me to remind you that the morning-after pill changes the lining of the uterus so that an egg will be less likely to implant into the walls of the uterus. It is not the abortion pill like many people believe. She said for you to be against the morning-after pill is just plain wrong. If you are against the morning-after pill you are against birth control. She wanted me to remind women that if you stay in the race, this alone could hurt your chances with voters, because of your extremist views on birth control.
God also thought Piers Morgan’s empty seat last night on his show representing you was pretty funny. God has a wicked sense of humor.
Anyway, Rep. Akin, your prayers are coming through loud and clear. Consider adding to your apology. God and American women are listening.
God via Aimee