Aimee Patton

A pleasantly eccentric take on politics

Dear Gun Rights Advocates:

Me again.

I know.  I’m a pain in the ass.


Since I have subscribed to many of your newsletters, I’ve noticed that a lot of you have been celebrating a recent “victory” that happened out of Trimble, MO last week.  Here’s a brief summary for those who didn’t follow the news.

Bank robber walks into the First Security Bank of Trimble and shows a gun demanding money.

Sounds like something taken from the Bank Robbery 101 play book.

Mr. Bank Robber gets shot in the bank.

Mr. Bank Robber gets in car.

Mr. Bank Robber takes police on a high-speed chase.

Mr. Bank Robber gets caught and is now in hospital and will go to jail.

Gun rights advocates go crazy with joy!  See good guys with guns took out bad guy with a gun – a la Wayne LaPierre.

Everyone lives happily ever after.

The end.

Now so fast my gun totting friends.  Let’s stop and think about some of these facts for a moment.

First, according to my friends at the Kansas City Star, it wasn’t exactly an armed “civilian”, it was a guard at the bank.  I know, here we go again with those silly facts.  Also, it begs the question if it was a civilian doing business at the bank, what’s the point of those silly signs posted everywhere with a gun and a slash across it?

Second, if the guard/civilian did shoot the bank robber in the face, the guard/civilian is a pretty crappy shot.  Mr. Bank Robber gets out of the bank, into his car and leads police on a 25 MILE POLICE CHASE from Trimble, MO to Kansas City.  Now I’ve never been shot in the face, so I’m just guessing, but I can imagine that if I was accurately shot in the face, operating a motor vehicle correctly for 25 miles would be pretty gosh darn hard.

Again, I’m no gun expert as I’ve said in previous blogs, but if I got shot accurately in the face, I would assume I would be dead.  That’s right – probably pretty darn dead.  Now I’m also no driving expert, but I’m going to go out on a limb and say I would need a face to drive a car.  I need  two eyes, my brain, maybe even my mouth to scream, “holy shit that hurt.”  So where exactly was he “shot in the face”?

I know…I can be a total pain in the ass with all of these questions.  I was one of those kids who constantly asked why.

So before you keep celebrating your gun rights victory, take a second and think about some of these things.  I don’t consider a guard at a bank a “civilian”.  I think the Department of Motor Vehicles may want to require on our driving requirements that everyone driving have a face.  That is if we are going to be able to drive say more than 5 miles.

Anyway, sorry for interrupting your gun love fest.

Yours in annoying questions,





3 thoughts on “Bank Robber Shot by Civilian – Gun Rights People Go Crazy

  1. bobarmi says:

    Have you driven in Johnson County? I am positive that a brain is not a requirement to drive a car. The hero of the day was a bank employee, it’s a little fuzzy here but from the story I got he was an office worker with a CCW not a guard. The bank robber was shot in the jaw with .357 magnum. The .357 is a very powerful round, and from the description this guy was a bloody mess. Sudden trauma like that can cause an adrenalin dump. An adrenalin dump combined with the shock onset from loss of blood, not to mention any recreation drugs that he may have ingested, and I would say this guy’s brain went into lizard mode aka fight, flight or surrender. He was cognoscente that he had hurt badly but the lizard brain was in control, he couldn’t fight, and if he surrendered he was going to jail so the only option was to get out of Dodge. Luckily this knucklehead didn’t crash and kill somebody. Police got his disabled his car and the guy gave up.

    So CCW holder was hero of the day, good guys with guns stop bad guys with guns (although it was just a toy pistol). The real message that is being sent is to the bad guys is that more and more people are carrying and the is just one question they have to ask themselves, “Do I feel lucky?…. well do you punk?”

    1. Thanks Bob-I will say that I do there is an element of racism to this whole thing that can’t be ignored. You can’t tell me with a straight face that is it was African-American people and lawmakers making a run on weapons and demanding arming citizens whites would be screaming that a race war is upon us. The paranoia is coming from somewhere and all I keep hearing is “home invasion” and possible government abuse of power. The likelihood of my home being invaded is smaller than the likelihood that I may kill my kid “cleaning” my gun. Also history has shown us that our government has turned on our people…lets see…that would be…NEVER, unless you are talking about white southerners who turned on the government first.

      America is afraid of something and it seems we should be afraid of the suburban white kid going on mass shootings but we are yelling more about “home invasions” and government invasions as a way not to restrict guns. Hell give everyone a tank for the driveway and a grenade for the nightstand and I’m sure we will be better prepared.

  2. bobarmi says:

    Grenades are impractical for home defence, as for the tank what a great way of saying, “Get off my lawn”.

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