Welcome to my segment: Tuesday in Oy Vey
Here is my top 5 list for things that have me going – seriously?
1. The control tower in Kansas City that closed down temporarily due to a spider infestation. Evidently, mama spider had babies – Mazel Tov! Problem was, she had 1000+ babies in a control tower. The little gems bit some controllers and forced the control tower to shut down temporarily so they could get Joe the Bug Guy out to exterminate. (If you don’t sleep well tonight – you’re welcome!)
2. Candy Crush. If you need yet another thing to obsess over it’s Candy Crush. I said I wouldn’t start and now…excuse me for a sec while I play a round. The app even posts on Facebook for you to show your friends what a loser you are. *psst…friends on Facebook, I totally need more lives. I’ll be your best “friend”.
3. Baseball – you get a huge oy vey today. Why? You would think I would be coming down on A-Rod, but no I’m shaking my finger at baseball. Any sport that give a $30 million bonus for home runs encourages all of its players to take the risk, drug themselves up and go for the big payout. Think about it – you don’t drug and guarantee you will never become a super star. You drug, become a super star, collect your massive paycheck and after a while they figure it out and then they shame you. Here’s the deal – it’s long enough to collect enough money that you could cure our national debt. Why not take the risk? Not taking the risk means you will for sure not get a $200 million contract. Take the risk and cha-ching!
4. My heartburn. I had heartburn yesterday and then I realized Paul Ryan will be visiting my neck of the woods for a fundraiser in September for Gov. Brownback. I really need to invest in Tums to make it until September with this knowledge.
5. Weiner’s sexting partner makes a porno. Seriously? Oy vey….