Dear Hobby Lobby:
I’m sure you are going to be shocked as hel..I mean heck to get this letter from me. I know we have NEVER seen eye-to-eye before, however, I had to reach out to you in light of the most recent allegations that you are anti-Semitic. I heard that a woman went into a Hobby Lobby in New Jersey and asked where the Bar Mitzvah cards were. In response an employee said, “We don’t cater to you people.”
So kind of like your social views, the term “you people” is very 1950. You are probably going to need to invest in a little sensitivity training- strike that – A LOT of sensitivity training.
I’ve uploaded your “In God We Trust” manifesto in 5 point font so everyone can become familiar with your company and because I haven’t had a good headache in a while.
Anyway, I think the woman must have been confused when she was in your store that you would carry Bar Mitzvah cards. Having been in your stores before, it is almost IMPOSSIBLE not to trip over the enormous collection of crosses in your store. As a Jewish person I admit I was a little overwhelmed by all the Christianity. Once, I asked where something was and I think I remember the sales person say, “Go down to the crosses and make a right.” “The iron crosses or the wooden crosses?” I replied.
I think I even overheard some clergy entering your store saying, “I really think they need to tone it down on the Christian decor.”
There is NOTHING in your store that would give even the remote impression that you are inclusive of any other religion than Christianity. The woman seeking Bar Mitzvah cards must have been temporarily confused by the blaring Christian music that plays in the background.
Anyway, due to the outrage by the Jewish community, your corporate headquarters replied:
“Hobby Lobby Stores, Inc. is currently working with our buyers over our merchandise selection. Our customers have brought this to our attention and we are currently evaluating our Holiday items and what we will carry in the future.”
Nice corporate speak, but let’s cut the cra..stuff. (I’m trying to appeal to your Christian sensibilities and keep this clean.) You mean you didn’t notice that there wasn’t one Star of David anywhere in any of your stores? You put out a manifesto on your website on
how our government should be run, but you just now noticed you are lacking in Judaica? Stop being so wussy and say, “Look our store is all about Jesus. You are NOT going to find your Menorah here folks. You can buy your glue guns to decorate the dreidel, but not the actual dreidel. ” This goes for all religions that aren’t Christianity.”
Is it WWJD? No, but it is what Hobby Lobby should do.
Does this mean you are anti-Semitic? Nope. For once, you and I agree on something – you are off the hook for having to carry the latest in Judaica. . I believe in religion this is called a miracle (cue the Angels singing). Don’t worry, I have faith it will NEVER happen again.
Yours in freedom of choice,