You bought the turkey, the potatoes and the green beans in anticipation of Thanksgiving 2014. It’s the day before Thanksgiving and you’ve got everything ready. There is one thing, however, that has your anxiety building. It’s not if you will be able to get the right ratio of green beans to crunchy onions or if your gravy will turn out lumpy. What has your anxiety off the charts is how you are going to navigate the uncomfortable political discussions that come up everything Thanksgiving.
With Ferguson and Obama’s immigration plan on most American’s minds right now, I guarantee that you won’t make it to pumpkin pie before one of your drunk relatives says, “how about that decision?”
It doesn’t matter where you fall on the political spectrum, if you are like most families, you have all views represented around your table from your Christian Conservative Uncle Jim and Aunt Betty to your Liberal hipster cousin Owen who recently moved to Seattle. One thing is for sure everyone has an opinion and everyone will want to be heard.
That is why the #1 most important thing is how to appropriately deal with the conversation to keep the peace this Thanksgiving. Here are my top 5 ways to survive the political conversation at your Thanksgiving.
#1 Your Uncle Bob starts yelling about Obama’s imperial presidency. We all have this uncle. He’s not in the door 5 minutes before he starts ranting about Obama’s imperial presidency and the immigration plan. You know exactly what he’s going to say, because it’s posted all over his Facebook wall and he tags you every time he posts something new, which is every hour on the hour. You can’t help, but chuckle in every post where he uses the hashtag #Obummer.
Tip – don’t waste your time on the irony of this immigration rant and the journey of the pilgrims. It will be lost on him.
What to do – buy some Imperial Margarine and have it on the table. Every time you hear Uncle Bob say “imperial presidency” say, “did you say pass the Imperial Margarine?” It will be funny the first 20 times and then he will eventually stop.
#2 Discussions about ISIS – the most entertaining way to deal with these discussions is to make a game with your brother Mike. You get a point for every time you change the consonant at the end. You get double points if you are able to change the vowel at the beginning without anyone noticing. You have to start slow from ISIS to ISIL and then move slowly into other consonants at the end – ISIK and then ISIF. Double points for OSIS and ESIS. You win the whole game if you say ASSES and nobody notices.
#3 Should pot be legal discussion with your hipster cousins – just let them rant. Odds are they showed up to your dinner already high.
#4 Drinking Game – this one is easy-every time your grandparents say, “in my day” drink. Everything was better in their day. It just was. Deal with it.
#5. Ferguson – it is likely that every Thanksgiving table in America will be discussing the decision. I hope that everyone can take a moment to pray for peace and closure for the family of Michael Brown and the community of Ferguson.
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