Aimee Patton

A pleasantly eccentric take on politics

Would you believe we are more than a year out from the next Presidential election?  With all the press, you would think we were only a month away.

What the Dem’s have provided us with an absolute campaign snoozefest, the GOP has made up for in a Kardashian-like reality show.  It’s hotter than Kansas City in July.  I’ve been wanting to write about it for weeks, but I haven’t been able to shoot the gap and begin typing between outrageous statements.

First, there are more candidate in GOP race for the White House than kids in the Duggar family.  Here they are in no particular order:

Trump, Cruz, Bush, Huckabee, Walker, Carson, Rubio, Perry, Snoopy, Santorum, Kasich, Fiorina, Graham, Ziggy, Paul, Pluto, Patton…

Maybe I made some of those up to see if you were still awake.

With a candidate pool like this, what’s the best strategy for standing out?

Dazzling Americans with your amazing foreign policy plan?


Wow us with your plan for economic prosperity?

Not a chance.

Hurl insults at groups of people and make Holocaust references whenever possible?  Cue the confetti, drop the American Flag and send in the bald Eagles – we have a winner!

First you have “The Donald” who we all know insulted a group of people with absolutely no fact behind what he was saying.

Quick reminder  – Donald hasn’t outlined anything substantial he will actually DO as President.  Every time he says something outrageous his poll numbers go up. In fact, he’s leading right now.  Screw actual details about what he would bring to the table as President – just keep ranting about all the people you think are bringing down the country Donald. If you run out, just resort to “your mama” insults. It’s working like a song.

We have one year left.  I think his campaign manager is coming up with a list of minorities for him to insult on a weekly basis- it should have him skating right into the nomination.

Let’s just assume his economic plan for America is more golf courses and colorful ties.

Then we have Mike Huckabee who decided he HAD to do something in order to get noticed.

Gee…what to do? What to do?

I know! Donald I will see your insults and I’ll raise you an inappropriate Holocaust reference.

Sure enough that’s what the very Christian Mike Huckabee did when discussing the Iran deal that the Obama Administration worked out.  I’ll quote this one, because it’s just too disgusting to pass up,

“This president’s foreign policy is the most feckless in American history. It is so naive that he would trust the Iranians. By doing so, he will take the Israelis and march them to the door of the oven. This is the most idiotic thing, this Iran deal. It should be rejected by both Democrats and Republicans in Congress and by the American people. I read the whole deal. We gave away the whole store. It’s got to be stopped.”

Wow Mike.  You really went for it there.  We will just have to wait and see if your poll numbers got a boost on that one.

Watching this reminds me of the Will Farrell movie “The Campaign” – at least no one has punched a baby yet.  But then again – the campaign still has a year to go.






10 thoughts on “The GOP Presidential Race turns from clown car joke to actual shit show

  1. Aimee, with all due respect, WILL YOU SHUT YOUR LIBERAL MOUTH!

    1. Dave Kaup says:

      brainjones, with all due respects, you don’t like what she has to say then don’t read her posts. Stay with Fox Noise…they will comfort you.

  2. SuperDavve says:

    There you go Brian, instead of offering up an opposing viewpoint you decide to be disrespectful. Here’s a tip for you…..find another blog of your liking to post on. BTW…you don’t get a free pass for prefacing “with all due respect.”

  3. Rebecca James says:

    Best wrap up of the GOP race yet! I have faith, however, that you will top your personal best, Ms Patton

  4. Confucius TheIssue says:

    I regret to inform this Johnson County blogger that she has NOT helped me to win a wager, in this most recent posting. Exactly how did this travesty unfold, you’re no doubt asking yourself ? Well, dear reader, I had wagered that Ms. Patton’s next blog entry would be a scathing, yet humorously eccentric, diatribe against the candidacy of one Hillary Clinton for the 2016 Democratic nomination for President.

    Please stop laughing! Yes, of course, I’m aware that in all her past entries Ms. Patton has almost exclusively attacked Republicans, Conservative policies, mainstream religious values, Constitutional protections, and generally all that is right and just in our Midwest heartland. But, my understanding was that she had checked herself into the Wrongheaded Clinic for some much needed psychoanalysis and corrective therapies. Perhaps she remains in treatment, and this posting represents a final relapse of sorts? Well regardless, we hope that she regains her sanity and awakens from the somnambulant state of partisan Liberalism in which she’s been mired for years……trapped like an insect embedded within amber.

    Now, shall we examine her psychotic writing? Agreed, I concur.

    “The GOP Presidential Race turns from clown car joke to actual shit show” Oh my!! She’s come off the rails already and we have yet to read the body of the posting. Buckle up everyone and be sure to have your waders at the ready.

    “What the Dem’s have provided us with an absolute campaign snoozefest…” and “there are more candidate in GOP race….” Goodness gracious! Insanity and incomprehension rear their ugly heads early and often in this posting. What we have here is a failure to communicate!

    Now, we believe that Ms. Patton was attempting to express her frustration with the sanitary effluence (please note spelling) emanating thus far as potential 2016 Presidential candidates. And on this point, we find something to draw strength from, so, perhaps the entire cranial cavity has not become metastasized with ill-thought. And while she has a rational point on many of those which she highlighted, we note with caution that she entirely omitted all announced candidates from across the aisle.

    Students, is this a case of hemianopsia? Is she blind in her left visual field? If so, what part of her brain has been damaged?

    While the students review their neurology and brain pathway notes, let us close with the reminder to all that……..

    “The superior man/woman……does not set his/her mind either for anything, or against anything; what is right he/she will follow.”
    ——Kong Qiu

    1. Aimee Patton says:

      I think deep down you dig me. Love, Aimee

      1. Sam Iam says:

        Uh….gee….Sally, I don’t think that’s what it said!

  5. Greg says:

    I find it interesting how many people like what Donald Trump has been saying!!-and this both democrats and republicans !! I think it is because many of us are sick of the political correctness!! I know I am !
    I am also sick of the crooked politicians – that think they are above the law both republican and democrats -lying to us and stealing our money !! And the Queen of that is Hillary!!
    And honestly I am impressed with many of the candidates – if you would take time to listen to some you might honestly be impressed too!!

    1. David Murphy says:

      Hi Aimee,
      How are you?

      I thought this was a fun watch:–

      Carly is a huge underdog at this point…but she did well apparently at the Happy Hour debate on Thursday.

      Seems like she could really, hugely destroy Hillary in a debate.


      David Murphy

  6. Xari Farrar says:

    I love to hear what your liberal mouth has to say. The gentleman who doesn’t should just log-off! ;o)

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